With life experience I’ve come to be able to recognize and distinguish the things to be thankful for. The value and importance of all those little things, indiscernible in youth, that have become visible with time. Looking back, I don’t recall Thanksgiving as a significant celebration. It felt a notch above a regular Sunday dinner, but it certainly fell well behind Christmas and Easter. As urbanites we were far removed from the harvesting that prompts the event. Furthermore, living on the west coast, we were also separated from extended family, and as a result, I didn’t associate Thanksgiving with the gathering of family. Thinking about it further, I suspect my parents and grandparents would also have felt a similar sense of isolation, being separated from their family, most of whom were in Europe.
My parent’s preference was for duck. I think it was a more practical choice for a family of four; less daunting than a large turkey. As well, duck was closer to what my father said was his parent’s ritual food, goose. Just once did I try cooking one. It didn’t go very well. Since getting married and having our own children we have celebrated by combining both our traditions: duck or turkey and moon cake.
But it seems to me that Thanksgiving, in Canada, is gaining more importance. Or maybe it’s just me. I don’t think it’s reached the scale of American Thanksgiving, but it is certainly trending. I’ve been told the reason the American Thanksgiving is so prominent is that it is a non-secular celebration, and thus it is inclusive; it does not exclude based on religious or cultural beliefs. This sounds very egalitarian to me; every people have a harvest and every culture likes to celebrate. So it follows that mixing turkey and moon cake isn’t irrational.
This year, out of that void, Linda and I will celebrate Thanksgiving five times. The first three with relatives in Europe, then with our children and grandchildren in Toronto, and the last with my relatives in the United States. The Canadian and American dinners will be a non-secular turkey with all the trimmings. But with my relatives living in the Rhine-Mosel region we can expect lots of wine (that’s what they harvest there). With those who live in southern Bavaria, it will be Wiener Schnitzel and with the ones in Munich, it will be Rostbratwürste and Edelhell aus dem Holzfass (BBQ bratwurst with beer served from a wooden keg). The wooden keg is important, and increasingly rare.
Celebrating five times may seem overboard, but I’m not just catching up for lost ground on family celebrations, I’m maintaining social connections.
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